I went to the kitchen, and not really feeling hungry at all, again,decided to forego the bran flakes, and did my morning workout in theLivingroom. So many things ran through my mind, like the fact that Iwas now seriously thinking about starting the 'transitioning' process.I had never actually considered actually transitioning. But since mytalk with Janice Tuesday morning, I found I couldn't stop thinkingabout it. I wanted to come out, and possibly not just at work, buttotally. I wanted to start hormone therapy, and have some surgicalfeminization procedures done to help me look more feminine.I didn't want to go 'all the way', but I knew that with the rightcombination and dosage of estrogen, and anti-androgens, I would becomemore feminine, and my testicles, and my 'clitty' would shrink from whatI had read. But the desire for body shaping, butt lift, D, or even DDbreast implants, something so big there was no way of ever hiding them,forcing me to accept my new position in life. I wanted. Kim whispered something to Pat that made her giggle and made me twitch. I was watching the other two couples exchange partners and although no one made any overt sexual moves, it was clear where things were headed.I leaned over to Pat and whispered. "I can't tell you how much I appreciate you inviting me to this, but, I think I'd better go." Why?" she asked aloud.I winced as everyone looked at me. "Well, for one, I didn't bring a partner to share with the group, so it's not really fair."She looked a little disappointed. "Oh. I had sort of ... oh. Sorry."The response caught me. "You had sort of what?"She looked at Kim then looked away embarrassed."She had been sure you were gay." Kim said sounding amused."After Yvette?" Because of Yvette."I sat back, more than a little stunned. "I didn't know I gave off such a gay vib." I looked at her. "So what did you think when I asked you out?" I wasn't sure." She confessed. "But I figured either way, if you were into it, one of us would get.
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