“You’ve always been really good at that.” “Thanks, Maz. One tries. Fancy a glass of wine? “Marvellous.” I got up and walked to my kitchen. I was taking a month off after working on location in Singapore for a tv series in which I played a homicidal banker. It was all sharp suits and heels and a lot of blood. I swear Flick Caterham (my agent) gets me work like this deliberately. Anyway, I’d finished the series and was home in my London apartment and Maz was rehearsing for a West End show so, as often happened, she and I had got together for what she liked to call ‘a little catch-up.’ I slipped back into bed beside her and handed her a glass and rested back against the headboard. “Oh,” said Maz. “I was meaning to tell you. You’ll never guess who I bedded when I was in Seattle.” “I didn’t know you’d been to Seattle?” “A screen test. Got the job, thanks for the congratulations. Anyway, guess.” “Judi Dench?” “Judy Hollander.” “Judy Hollander? She’s not gay. Bugger me she’s positively the. Join me at my altar; be one of my servants and I will protect you. Come walk my Hecate’s wheel if you dare, and be reborn!”She dropped her robes and took a step towards me; her gray eyes looked right through me. I had a sense of déjà vu as I gaped at her vaginas. They seemed so familiar! I wanted to worship and make love to all three but some primal fear dissuaded me and held me back. When I hesitated, a strong wind on my back blew me right past Hecate and towards the edge of the far side of the mountain. I stopped there at the boundary. In the next moment, I chose to jump into the darkness rather than be with her. I heard her haunting voice echoing through the canyon.“It’s okay to forgo my favor, Actaeon, but remember, I have offered you more than you will ever find elsewhere.”It was a timeless fall to a sandy bottom, (although not more than ten feet); a time filled with the horror of not knowing. I thought of Blake (oh, “To see a world in a Grain of Sand) as I tumbled over and over.
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