I climb up onto the St. Andrews cross and grab on…until She walks over and calmly fastens the straps.“Uh, I was only going to…”“We’re going to do a full dress rehearsal, pet. After all, we need to know if we’re…compatible.”She leans back to look at me. “Wouldn’t you agree?”I slowly nod.“Good. Now, hold still.”And before long, I am tightly fastened to the cross, naked, legs apart, ready to be violated, very wet, and suddenly…eager.She moves away, fits the jaguar head over Her head, like the actors of Lion King, puts Her hands into gloves with metal claws, and opens Her gown to reveal a feeldoe, already in place.It’s big. Much bigger than the one I had secured.“Realism, pet,” She strokes the lubricated feeldoe. “Jaguars are the largest cats in the Americas, after all. And we have to give the crowd something to oohh and aahh over, don’t we?” She smiles, and there is something there that reaches deep inside me.Plus, I have no choice. I want to belong to Her so badly I truly will do. Perhaps one day he’d burn for that one. Perhaps. But for sure he would burn without it. He began to walk around her, waiting for her to break her pose, noting long thighs that begged to be kissed. He barely heard her words. We all have our silly dreams, I think. Mine is to be whole again, to live freely. I’d welcome my birthdays until my vanity had gone, along with my looks. Maybe a man would love me and, with his years, wouldn’t mind my ruin. We could rest on a park bench. We could talk about funny little things that only we knew. He could look at the pretty girls. I wouldn’t care for I’d do the same with the boys, and we’d pretend they passed, unnoticed. And so that’s me, George. I’m pretty and I’m horrible. I tell truths and the opposite and I connive like a bitch. I have room for lust but none for pride. What have I done to be proud of? I don’t pretend to have shame. I can talk like this because tomorrow you won’t remember a thing. He gazed at the tuft between her legs, noting.
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