I knew that the bastard had been marked down as a gay rapist, they had told me that this made him a special kind of prisoner. They had believed me to an extent when I had said I had not wanted to have sex with him, but that did not change the out come for me any more than it changed it for him. “George you be a good boy and do what you are told.” My father says to me I glare at him from where I am. Like I have a fucking choice in the matter you cunt I think to myself. I may only be fourteen but let me tell you something I knew how to cuss back then just as much as I know how to cuss now. My father was telling me what he thought I needed to hear but it wasn't him permanently marked or plugged or made to walk like this. “Just think George it is only six years you will be twenty when you get out.” My mother says to me I growl at her. “The babies you will have, at least you will be no fagot when you come out.” She says to me I am quickly losing my cool with her for this. “Better a fagot. "It was hot," she said. "Hot, hot, hot. One after another, bang, bang, bang, thirty-one happy girls sorted just like that."She had touched a sore point. "Thirty happy girls," I pointed out, "and one rape victim." But James," argued Connie, "she's fine about it. I talked to her afterwards. She said, [and here Connie made a woeful attempt at a Polish accent] 'I was silly and frightened but it was fantastic. I should have known he would never hurt me. I'm his now, for ever.' 'You and all the rest of us, ' I told her."I pondered this. "Well," I said doubtfully, "I suppose it's good she feels all right about it but it was wrong, all the same." James," insisted Connie, "you mustn't go on beating yourself up about this. She's OK with it. I told you she would be, remember?" You didn't see the look in her eyes," I said. "I don't know if I'll ever forget it. She was scared, really terrified." Yes," agreed Fran. "It must have been awful for her. Rape must be every girl's worst nightmare. The.
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