( it is a practice to make women sit safely) I sat beside her being careful not to touch her. I was sitting cursing myself for taking up this assignment when suddenly he spoke. Where are you from. I said Coimbatore, he said, my wife said that you came on an office duty. I said yes, where are you working. I said marketing generators and machines.My wife is bored to be in hotel alone so she wanted to go out. Are you free he asked yes I said and since he was talking I asked about him for formalities sake. He is a wood cutting contractor, takes Gove tender to cut road side trees and sell to depots. Recently having heart problem and going under treatment. I was simply listening. We reached the beach and this fellow paid before I could pull out my wallet. A bit relief that they are paying. I wanted to show I too can spend so I purchased soft drinks for all the three and again he paid forcibly.I started feeling a little comfortable that they are friendly and cursed myself for having. I wasn't attracted to him, I didn't want to fuck him, I didn't want to have to do ... that. But I did do it. Or at least Mindy did. And distasteful though I find it to admit what happened ... Mindy did cum while she was doing it. Is that what it's about? Am I that much of a thrill junkie? On the one hand, I would never deny I have some degree of adrenaline addiction. I mean, I have literally jumped out of a plane for charity before. I can't say I've ever thought to connect the two. Jesus, that kind of makes it sound pathetic."Yeah, I agree, that sounds kind of extreme," my Rusky psychotherapist takes my silence as an answer. "Usually it takes people a lot to ... risk as much as you're risking. Personal tragedy, trauma ... they feel numb, so they want something intense and a little bit brutal to feel anything again. But maybe it's some kind of twisted search for meaning on your part. You see where I'm coming from? But maybe you're like a soldier, wanting to go back to Afghanistan.
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