It was an attitude readjustment. It was an emotional awakening as well. All of these changes/improvements just fueled the drive further. If it could be more intense, even by one extra spurt...one extra spasm, it was worth pursuing. It's amazing how confidence can breed comfort. It's far from cockiness, it's confidence. He hated cocky people. That never changed. His values, morals, and beliefs never wavered...just his general attitude and outlook on life. It was so cliché, but he knew it was true that you only live once, and it's over in a heartbeat. Why didn't he realize that sooner? Who knows, but he wasn't about to miss anymore now that the revelation had been achieved. His size was definitely never an issue. It's funny how some seem to have such blatant confidence, which borders on cockiness, and that same person is incredibly insecure when they get between the sheets. Maybe they are entirely secure and confident, but have no idea how bad they suck! Haha! Poor souls. Women must. It was almost like she was living two separate lives.When she flew in for the weekend or school holidays she overwhelmed the kids with questions and concerns. As for me, as for us, I know that I'm exaggerating, but it seemed that anytime Jan and I had a private moment, we were having sex.Great sex, too. During our "Golden Age of Sex" Jan became an accomplished fellatrix (her term, she was uncomfortable with saying cocksucker), and we experimented with great variety and enthusiasm. I swear I would get hard while driving to the airport to pick her up. I don't know how we made it safely home sometimes. My opinion was that if this was the price of her focusing on creative writing, I sure as hell wasn't going to complain about the method of payment. Which was why, when she graduated, I gave her a bright red 1939 Royal Quiet De Luxe Portable typewriter. According to those in the know, this was one of Ernest Hemingway's favorite typewriters. Jan was absolutely blown away. I jokingly told.
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