5 saal pahle suru hoti hai main apne schhol me ek ladki se payar karta tha , mujhe nahi pata tha ki vo payar tha ya kya tha but vo mujhe achhi lagti , vo mere se ek class pichhe thi so mai usko hamesha to nahi dekh sakta tha but jab bhi mujhe mauka milta tha mai use dekhta tha,aur vo bhi ye baat achhi tarah se janti thi bas hum log baate nahi karte the vo mujhe dekh kar sharma kar muskura deti thi, mujhe achhi lagta tha par mane kabhi uske sath sex karne ka nahi socha tha………but pata nahi sayad hamari kismat yahi likha tha , hamre school me ek function tha, it ws 15th aug. so seema participated in a dance aur mane speech me , us din main bahut narvas tha kyonki thodi hi der baad stage par mera speech tha, so main seema ko bilkul bhul hi gaya tha mujhe bilkul b yaad nai tha ki seema b yaha hi h make up rum me , m history vale sir se baate karte hue andar aaya toachanak seema ko dekha vo kisi ladki se baate kar rahi thi ,aur vo apni dress ke bare me baate kar rahi thi , mane history vale. You haven’t changed your hairstyle or bought different clothes since I met you. For God’s sake, Kelly, you’re twenty five, not fifty five. If we stay up past eleven you’re nodding.’ He waved my attempt to argue off. ‘I’m sorry, I really am, but it’s true. You have potential Kelly, but you won’t do anything about it. I think there’s passion in there somewhere, but you won’t let it out and I’ve given up mining for it. Find an older guy, someone more your style, pop out a couple babies. Be a housewife. It’ll suit you.’ He didn’t know how close to the truth he was. I DID want to be a housewife, with kids. But I wanted a loving husband, passionate, skilled, who could help me reach the sexual heights I desired. In the end, I wanted taken care of. I know, terribly old fashioned and out of date. I wanted a man who would look out for me, make the hard decisions, surround me with love. Like I was ever gonna find someone like that. I determined to drown my sorrows. My friends knew I had been.
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