He was relaxing in a leather armchair in front of the t.v., a can of beer in his hand. "I'm fine," I said, but I was thinking: this man fucks my girlfriend, who just happens to be his sister. Irrationally, I expected him somehow to look different, but of course he was the same as ever, the same old Steve. Whom I now knew was fucking his sister, regularly, in her bum, and had been doing so for years; nearly ten years, in fact. In her pussy as well, come to think of it. A small voice inside my head was saying, "Yes, Steve fucks his sister, but is it really so wrong?" I tried to silence the voice, but couldn't. Then I found myself thinking that I did like it. I liked it, and I felt guilty for liking it. He looked up, and waved his hand lazily at us. But this time, Effie didn't just say hello to him as usual. She went up to him, put her arms around him as he stood up, and kissed him deeply. When they stopped, he was clearly surprised that she had done it in front of me, and he looked. But I was young and couldn't. She was the reason I couldn't be with any other woman. Being with another woman after just existing in Mom's world would be akin to living in an efficiency apartment after having lived in a Hollywood mansion. I know, it's a bad analogy, but it's as close as I can get.Beyond the fact that she is extremely beautiful, what I feel for her is much deeper. It goes beyond the sexual desire, goes beyond wanting to possess her, to own her body. What I want and need is to possess her soul, I think that she still loves me as a mother to her son, but my dream is that I need her to love me like a woman loves her man.I'm in love with her and I need for her to love me too, because mother is the reason there is no longer a woman who satisfies me. When having sex, I settled for fucking like animals do, instinctively but without love. Today that is no longer enough.Young girls my age didn't interest me as I found them superficial and immature, so when I need company I.
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