"I'm used to it. I know I look... different." The truth of the matter is," I said rather too forcefully, trying to steer quickly away from this topic, "I WAS leering; but only because you are a remarkably beautiful girl. Please accept my heartfelt apology and deepest contrition. It won't happen again." Wanna bet?" Brenda said, grinning tauntingly at me. I gave her another glare and she laughed.I was making a very conscious effort NOT to stare, and just for something to do, I reached into my pocket and pulled out a map of the campground. I handed it to Willie. "Where are you camping?"She took the paper uncertainly. She suddenly looked very nervous. "Um... I'm not too good with maps, I'm afraid."She was holding the sheet upside down. I took it and righted it. Then I pointed to a sign hanging from a post beside our picnic table. "We're in campsite D-17," I explained.Again, she looked nervously at the paper in her hands. "Yes... well..." She stared at it for a long moment, then lowered. I was in so much pain the last time I was there I showed my ass a bit more than I should. At one point, I was an absolute dick. The funny thing was I was trying to be nice at the time. I didn’t see until my mind cleared a week or so later how I had treated her. She was gracious about it.They changed my med ratio which sent me to a small visit to la-la land. They decreased one med to help me start sweating and doubled another one to help me rest more. I haven’t started sweating yet, but I’m sleeping better. After I came back from la-la land that is. They also want me to start working with a speech therapist they had mentioned that before but I hadn’t followed up as 1. It doesn’t make sense to me. I know how to place my tongue and shape my lips. I can’t get my brain to send the damn signal. 2. I only have so much money to put toward co-pays and meds. 3. I only have one day a week to fit in my, my wifes and my kids, various appointments. I would like to enjoy some of my days off. I told.
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