"That will be your clothes for tomorrow. They probably smell by then, but you'll wear them proudly, to probe yourself that you can accept that people think you are a slut"Lillian nodded mesmerized, she was thinking if she could really accept that. Many persons really think now that she is a slut, Jean, her boss, Mr. Palmer, his driver, Megan, the readers of the amateur forum, the people in the subway that morning, and that afternoon. She felt overwhelmed, anybody that she had met in the last few weeks thinks she is a slut. She just hopped that Karen didn't think the same."OK, Lillian, to help you deal with that faster, I will call you slut from now on. In no time you will no feel the word as an insult but as another way to call you"Lillian remained quiet."OK. Slut, let's have some dinner"Lillian shivered but didn't say a thing. The dinner was pretty uneventful except for having to answer every time Megan called her slut. Which made her angered, humiliated and oddly aroused.Half an. That meant that Sunday would be the 24th. Christmas Eve. My wife and step-mother would insist on an ostentatious display of piety. Mass on both Sylvester and Christmas and money to their underlings. Gold to our servants, silver to the rabble.I was revolted on Gruendonnerstag, too. [Maundy Thursday] Luckily, I missed their bounty theatricals this year.Carl would be here. And Max. I will need to ask Josef. Roast goose on Monday and then a family excursion to the Cathedral for mass. I will attend mass, but not take communion. I cannot participate in that mockery.Christmas Day will be worse. First the gift-giving; then we will join my uncle and my detestable brother at the Augustinerkirche. And the next day, the ladies will return to St. Stephen’s to celebrate his having been stoned to death. That was for his blasphemy. What of theirs’? Insincere. Faithless.Was I any better? I had certainly led a sinful life. Fatally sinful. Perhaps my various pains were to atone for the previous.
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