‘And everybody better get out of your way. You run a business and manage Dad without him even knowing it. But when I paid closer attention, when you thought you weren’t being looked at, that’s when I saw how much it costs you. ‘You’re lonely, Mom.’ Christie had long since given up on eating, but she took a sip of her Coke just to do something, because if she spoke she knew she couldn’t lie and say she wasn’t. ‘You won’t tell me why, but I believe you when you say you can’t leave him. And with the way he watches you, follows you around and spies on you, he would know if you had an affair. And God knows what that son-of-a-bitch would do.’ ‘I’ve thought about it. He would kill him. He wouldn’t carry out his threats to me and my family, because if he did he’d lose me. What he wants more than anything, still after all these years, is to keep and control me. It gives me a power over him that I don’t think he’s aware of.’ ‘You’re careful how you use it.’ ‘Yes.’ ‘So you’re stuck,’ he said,. "The conversation is painfully slow and precise. Yes, there was a fight, no I'm not hurt. I'm very sorry, I will go and apologise. I lost my temper because she didn't ask, that's all. I stayed at Max's, no I'm not in trouble. No Max's isn't in trouble either and he was wonderful, he made me dinner and made me up a bed in the spare room and everything. I don't think, at this point, telling my mother exactly where I slept would be a good idea. No, again, I wasn't in trouble with the school and that I was really safe last night. Yes I'd like them to come and pick me up after school to take me to the Doc. Could they bring me some more clothes please. Yes, yes of course I'd talk about what we mentioned the other day, about my, I shudder to hear my mother say the phrase, sexual preferences.I put the phone down over half an hour later, suddenly exhausted, and stand in reception, trying to work out whether or not it's worth the effort to go back to maths. The decision is made for me when.
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