I had skipped meals from time to time without fear. I always knew there would be a meal waiting for me on the other side of the clock. This time, there would be nothing in our cupboard unless we stocked it ourselves. Starving to death is a miserable way to die"I don't care. I still don't think I could eat a rattlesnake," Alice shook her head as goose bumps covered her chest.Tragic stories of lost travelers who starved while surrounded by nourishment litter the pages of history. The truth is, our bodies are not terribly fussy when it comes to dinner. As long as it isn't poisonous or toxic, our digestive systems can extract protein or vital nutrients from almost any organic matter. There is never enough food if we don't consider everything on the table."Get up and lend a hand; you don't gotta eat 'em, but you have to help." We quickly got dressed. Alice held the Rayovac lantern aloft and played streetlight while I made our selection from nature's deli counter. A fat slumbering rattler. You're going to have to learn to dealwith their affection whether you want it or not."Again she had a point. "Okay, so I'll ask the question again. What am Isupposed to do?"My mother put her hands on my shoulder and looked me in the eyes. "It'sreal simple Toni. Enjoy being a girl and keep an open mind. That's allyou have to do."I took a deep breath and exhaled away my anxiety. A cigarette wouldhave helped more, but I wasn't ready to cross that bridge with my mom.*****I took a shower and changed clothes before we went to the mall. I puton some jeans and chose a loose fitting Polo shirt to conceal mybudding femininity. I was feeling very nervous about shopping in frontof Randy, but the cigarette I smoked before taking my shower had easedmy angst a bit.On our way to the mall, we stopped by drugstore and refilled myprescription. Mom told Randy that the pills were a special kind ofvitamin and he was never to take them. She told them they were only forme and he watched as I swallowed two.
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