• I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.• Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.• I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.• Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?• When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.• I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.• I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.• Velcro - what a rip off!• Don’t worry about old age; it doesn’t last.HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTSGod went to the Arabs and said, ‘I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.’The Arabs asked, ‘What are Commandments?’The Lord said, ‘They are rules for living.’‘Can you give us an example?’‘Thou shall not kill.’‘Not kill? We’re not interested... ‘So He went to the Blacks,The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said, ‘Honour thy Father and Mother.’‘Father? We don’t know who our fathers are. We’re not interested.’He went to the. The next morning after breakfast, I got dressed to go a lawyer's office. I'd called work and told them I needed to take some time off. I explained that I was having problems at home and needed time off. Once they agreed, I got in the car and headed out. The first stop was to the bank, I closed out all of the accounts, paid off the credit cards and all outstanding bills. There was very little left by that time, which I put in a new account under my name only. After I left the bank, I called all of the credit card companies and canceled all.their cards. I had a new one issued under my name only. I headed to the lawyer's office and arrived right on time. As I was ushered into his office, I told him I wanted a Divorce on grounds of Adultery. He asked if I had proof. I told him the story. He looked at me and said that was not enough for grounds of Adultery, but there were grounds for mental and physical abuse. I left his retainer and he started the paper work. He said Flo would be served.
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