They chose to train me as a cryptanalyst (that means code breaker, not somebody who counts body bags as one guy in an airport asked me when I told him what my job was). That meant that I fought the war from a desk, and the greatest danger I faced were the headaches from staring at stacks of coded messages all day.The second break came when I finished my advanced training and got my orders. I was still sure that I was going to Vietnam, but for some reason no one in our class was sent there. Some were assigned to Panama, some to Thailand, and some to Korea, including myself. When the instructor for our class found out that some of us were being assigned to Korea, he just grinned and said, "Korea, the best kept secret in the military." He didn't elaborate, but I hadn't been in Korea long before I knew what he was talking about.The "secret" was, cheap beer and pussy. And by pussy I'm not talking about blowjobs and quickies from sluts you find on the street corners. Oh no, the Korean. Let’s begin with Allen and Jamie. When we last saw you, you had gotten engaged. Have you had the wedding yet? ALLEN Yes, we actually got married in June. I know you’re probably wondering who was the bride. Jamie was the bride at that ceremony, but we’re planning a second ceremony where we’ll be in our switched roles. JAMIE Yes, it will be a private ceremony with a few close friends and everyone will be crossdressed, which I’m really looking forward to. Some of the guests are actually here today. MODERATOR Well, I hope I get an invitation. That sounds like a lot of fun. How often do the two of you become James and Ally? JAMIE Not as often as we would like. It’s kind of hard with our busy work schedules and now that we are expecting our first child. MODERATOR Oh, congratulations! When are you due? JAMIE January. That’s part of the reason why we didn’t.
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