Only a person with two eyes can perceive thethree-dimensional image hidden within the squiggly lines.Likewise, a person with magic can perceive things non-magical peoplecannot.And using magic -- releasing the flow of energy that fuels the spells --might be analogous to a kind of mental double-jointedness. Whatever itis, I no longer had that ability.I missed my magic, I missed my body, and I missed my maleness. Iregretted agreeing to let Mildred explore the potentials of masculinity,since that put him out of my sight. What if he had an accident? What ifhe managed to get himself injured or killed? Maybe I should have allowedhim to have sex with me just so I could keep an eye on him.Worrying myself sick obviously was not helping anything, so I tried towhile away the day by watching television. I even tried to read some ofMildred's collection of paperback novels, but found it very difficult torelate to the Harlequin romances -- even though I was inhabiting a femalebody.Mildred had. That's what you asked about, isn't it, O?I'll smut it up if you want. Let me know. Then you can blast it out to the smutverse if you want. I think your friends would like it. The sweet part of the deal is that no one will take it seriously.Mom is fucking retarded. She thinks she can still get me excited with wedding magazines and romance novels. Like I'm going to wake up one day and totally get it. Dad's just in it for the money. He boasts over the dinner table. Yeah, we still do that. How totally motherf-ing quaint. He boasts about how much easy business comes his way from the church and churchgoers and the holy-ass Christian women's club. I mean seriously, can you even believe there is such a thing?So when they figured out I was into girls (and it took them long enough to notice - it's not like I was doing an ace job of hiding it) they hit the roof hard.Well, he did. Mom doesn't do that. She just gets disappointed, which is much worse because she may be an asshole but she's still.
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