She told me I’d be up and about in a couple of days, but they needed to run some more tests, she was embarrassed and I thought it was because of you. When she showed me the x-rays… and explained what was wrong… I thought they’d made a mistake, that they were someone else’s x-rays… they couldn’t be mine. I took it from you… your future… I took it from you with my carelessness. I was supposed to take care of you… that’s what we promised… I should have died then… in your place, not this slow lingering death, a year while the Devil’s bony fingers play with my lungs, gripping them, squeezing them dry of air… a relentless grip… until I draw my last breath. I don’t understand how this is fair, I was dying even then, the illness had begun its final relentless surge, why were you taken in my place? Where is the fairness? Why were you not spared? I don’t understand it. I’ve told them not to ventilate me when I can no longer breath by myself. For those first few months… alone in our apartment,. In the car, Lisa complained, I cant believe the flight got delayed. I finally thought I was going to…. She stopped in mid-sentence. Going to what? I asked. Put those girls in their place, she covered. Lisa, if you want Ill look like a lovelorn boy tonight, I offered. That would be weird, Lisa answered with a sigh. Weird, yes, I agreed, but only you and I will know that. Everyone else will think you have a hot guy in lust with you. In lust with me? She asked, looking at me. Yes, I nodded, someone who sees you as a beautiful girl he wants to devour whole. Using my own internet words at the end definitely caused her cheeks to go red. She sighed, Its just I was so really looking forward to this night, this date. I understand, I nodded, but Ill be him as best as I can. Trust me, she sighed again, You cant be him. Trust me, I countered, I can be better. She then told me my background, which was all the things about the fake me, which was easy to do, since fake me was me. There was awkward.
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