He scanned the crowd and saw his employees laughing together as theywatched him being fought over by two male clowns. 'This can't getworse', Herschel thought before he fretted over how he could ever facehis employees again.Herschel's eyes fixated on the audience. The only relief he felt wasthat his girlfriend was nowhere to be seen. 'Thank God', Herschelthought as he began to inch his way away from the dueling clowns.One male clown separated himself from the other and grabbed Herschel bythe hand. Before Herschel could pull back, he pulled Herschel forwardby the hand and dropped to a bended knee before he hugged Herschel'swaist."Oh, ladies and gentleman, I believe Bonga accepted the proposal," thewoman who corralled him shouted into a microphone.Herschel shook his head while he saw his employees laughing before theother male clown stormed his would be suitor. The male clown at hisknee jumped to his feet and ducked away from the clown's slap. Theclown's hand landed firmly on. I told her why I wanted proper closure of what happened. The reasonings for why I felt like such a complete and utter failure as a person; the state of my own home, admitting some personal feelings and moods, the whole deceptive nature in her trying to "talk", my own shame in breaking my own personal code, my own feelings of my own identity and self worth. The end result: It felt like I was talking to a wall. The times I tried to converse with her, she was either too busy at work to hold a proper conversation or she just really didn't... understand what I was getting at all. Nicole told me, "You should be happy. You touched my boobs. That's a great thing. I don't know why you're making a big deal about this." How could she not? How could she not understand my feelings after I told and explained to her my own position on the matter? Was I truly in the wrong in feeling and reacting the way I did? One thing led to another and in the end, I told her I gave up. I gave up trying to.
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