If I never play again, it won’t devastate me.”Coach took a deep breath, almost a sigh of relief. “Ok.” Was all he said until we got to the ER.I was lifted carefully from the van and placed on a gurney. I was then wheeled directly into the x-ray department. 45 minutes later, a Dr. Walsh (according to the stitching on his immaculate scrub smock) came into the ER all full of himself and almost gleefully said, “Well Mr. Rasmussen, it looks like you will be spending the night in our fine establishment. Tomorrow morning you will be flown to the university med center in the city for ankle surgery. You have four small bones broken and numerous bone fragments that need repair or removal. You will probably never play football again, but other than a stiff ankle, you should heal fine.”I looked at coach and with a raised eyebrow I asked; “Is there any doctor in the hospital besides this cheerful windbag? He seems almost gleeful that I am injured. I want nothing to do with him.”I had a thought.. ”“I’m a lot better than what you have to look at in the mirror every morning.”“I thought I said goodbye to you this morning when I flushed the toilet.”“Funny you should call me an ugly bitch, your daddy likes to call me princess and other beautiful names, while he is dry humping my leg.”“I love it when you call me by your mum’s name ... turns me on.”“If you’re trying to improve the world, you should start with yourself. Nothing needs more help than you do.”“I could eat a whole bowl of alphabet soup, shit it out, and have something better than you just said.”“Shut up, I’m not your mirror.”“Behind every bitch there’s a man who made her that way!”“Ohh ... look who’s talking about themselves again!”“See ya and take care ... and by see ya I mean go fuck yourself and by take care I mean go fuck yourself.”“People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world.”“Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding that the other person is a complete idiot.”“You’re.
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