Grandma Flo would hug us with jowly arms and kiss our heads and faces and haul our unresisting little bodies into the kitchen. She was plump, blousy and Cockney to the core. Although a child, I was blessed with a photographic memory and snapshot morsels of my childhood are etched like engravings within my brain…I feel at liberty to confidently express them. We would traipse through to Grandma’s kitchen in a little crocodile, giggling and skipping excitedly through the parlour…’come on me’ ducks’ she would say as she led us to Nirvana. Jimmy the huge white cat would tag along optimistically – his size entirely due to his capacious appetite – omnivorous as a bear, he would devour anything organic which crossed his path. To reach the kitchen you passed through the Parlour with its Oak dado panelling, pictures of Kent & Suffolk life, a brick-built inglenook and an enormous American Oak table. We grew to love this place …playing card games, Escalado and dominoes in this warm and. .. I can't find my dildo anywhere!," screamed Carol."Alice... where did you put my rubbers?!? God we're going to be late to the Wilson's again!" yelled Mike.It was Friday night at the Brady household, and Mike and Carol were off to another orgy at the Wilson's, while the Brady kids had their own plans for the night.Greg comes running into the room, "Hey Pete, I got it, I got it... three joints of some far-out shit from Bill!!!" Well what are you waiting for, light it up before Bobby comes home. You know how he gets when he's all stoned."As Greg and Peter were getting high, Marsha and Cindy came walking through the front door. "I told you Cindy that it's going to hurt a little bit the first time, but look how much money you made."I know, but don't you think Sam's a bit too old?!?... and what would Alice say if she finds out?!?Oh... don't worry about it. Hey, let's go see what the boys are doing!"As Marsha and Cindy ran up to the boys' room, Bobby was hiding in the garage, stroking his.
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