I thought I was using her back then. I probably was. We started out as friends. I knew she wanted more than that, but my ego told me she was a step down for me. Then I got to know her. When one of my friends told me he was going to ask her out I panicked and declared my love for her. I thought I was being cruel. I thought I was playing with her emotions, but really this was all a denial of the truth. My wish before I ever met Dana, when I was dressing myself in lingerie as an undergrad, was to find what I called an alternative girl. I dreamed of finding a woman who wouldn’t flinch when she heard about my sexual fantasies. She was a girl willing to have sex before marriage. She was willing to do everything Raquel and I had done in my car back in high school. She went to church but wasn’t married to religion. She just wanted to have me, please me. Dana had all of these things. And the more acceptance she showed me, the more I fell in love with her. I thought I had finally found a woman. "Thanks for the helpful advice," Paige snorted."If it's relationship advice you want, you've REALLY come to the wrongplace," Anna-Jade laughed."...Thought you and Paul were doing okay?" Paige said, before laughing."God, so weird to call another person 'Paul' knowing that I'll never becalled that myself again..." Tell me about it," Anna-Jade laughed. "Sometimes I hear someone say'Anthony' and it's all I can not to respond. And for the record, me and'Mr. Kennedy' are doing okay. Doesn't help that I'm at work all week,but then again, he will be in January, all those people joining gymsfor the New Year..." ...So you've booked a holiday in February?" Paige asked, making theIrishwoman giggle."Got a week in Australia booked," Anna-Jade said with a smug smile."Wanted somewhere far away from anywhere served by Soixante fuckingTrois, heh!" Think you've done that, heh!" Paige giggled."Question is," Anna-Jade said, "when and where are you and Jessicagoing on your next holiday?" Anna-Jade smiled.
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