A narrow, rock-choked irrigation ditch flowed east beyond the yard, carrying snow field water from Wolf Creek to a barren pasture below the house.Upstairs, two plank-floored bedrooms were spanned at their backs by a single walk-in closet that bridged the stairway and could be walked through from doorways at each end. Windows in each outside wall provided light and ventilation. Dee chose the room overlooking the west yard and driveway. Alex Jr. and Graydon got the room over the kitchen.A black cast-iron, pot-bellied parlor stove with chrome trim and a mica-paned fire door heated the main room. Its black steel stovepipe rose up through the floor above to a brick chimney, its base set on a shelf high in the stairway enclosure. A cast-iron wood-fired range with high-backed warming ovens stood against the kitchen side of the stairway enclosure. An under-stair pantry stood beside the kitchen entrance. The two stoves heated the entire house.Sawdust filled the spaces between the sheathing. It wasn’t an emergency or anything, it just became busy. Between the activity in the hallway and the discussion in the room it triggered the anxiety thing. The doctor bless her heart is an exuberant person by nature. She said something really loud. I about came unglued and said “DON’T DO THAT!”. I startled everyone including myself as it jumped right out of my mouth. I apologized and explained my situation. So it looks like I get to carry my sensory equipment everywhere now.An unexpected thing is that during an anxiety episode heavy metal or tribal music is soothing in an unusual way. When I say heavy metal I mean death metal, the fringe type of metal. Hardcore heavy metal. What is unexpected about it is at any other time I can’t stand the sound of it. During an anxiety attack it is as though a part of my mind is racing like an engine without a gear engaged. When I hear that music the racing engine engages it and quits bothering me. I can do what I need to do thinking wise. The.
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