The place our first date had been, where it all started. I love him more than anything in the world. We talked and laughed, and just before our desert came, he produced a tiny box. I couldn't imagine what it could be. The economy was down since we met, money was tight, I already knew what a sacrifice it was for him to take me here. “Happy birthday,” he said."Oh Zack," I said, "You didn't have to." I want you to have it," he replied, smiling.I opened the box; inside it was what looked like the sort of box that folds open for jewelry. I carefully removed it and opened it. Inside was a beautiful sapphire and white gold necklace. I had always wanted a sapphire since I was a little girl. I didn’t know what to say. All I could do was smile and reach over and hug him. I was almost crying. “I know you always wanted one.”“But… how did you possibly afford this? It’s beautiful!” I said.“Don’t worry about it,” Zack said with a smile. “Here, let me put it on you.”He lifted my hair and tightened. That’s the lowest level of hell. Soulless existence.”“I hadn’t ever thought about it that way.”“What would be the worst thing you could imagine? I think, for you, it would be being an automaton, programmed by the laws of physics to exist and carry out a program. For you, that would be sheer hell.”“But isn’t control illusory?”“Of everything except your own soul? Perhaps. But not that.”“That sounds very much like something Yoshiro would say.”Michelle smiled, “I read the Lotus Sutra I found in your study.”I chuckled, “Of course you did.”“I’m trying to meet you where you are spiritually. I know you can’t become Orthodox. And you won’t. But did you know that was Kara’s gravest fear at one point? That you would convert and set her aside?”“It would never have happened.”“You never know. People on spiritual journeys often do VERY strange things. Like running away to a monastery. Or going to Japan for five weeks and coming back transformed. The right, or wrong, event might have pushed you to.
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