Why don’t they just learn French or Latin? Those are real languages, with real books written in them. Seriously, why don’t they just have a fucking Department of Literature? Nobody wants to major in Grammar and the Song of Roland. Besides, all they talk about is post-post-feminist politics and the Third World anyway. It’s all Social Science for Retards. **** I look at myself in the mirror. Do I like what I see? Oddly, yes. It’s sickening to admit, but sometimes I’m a bit entranced with myself. It’s ridiculous, no one else is. I’m a solipsist, yes. But why not? Is anyone else falling over their heels to love me? I’m a bit of a munchkin. I’m too short, I suppose. But I really do love the face I have. It’s round, pale, innocent. I wear heavy glasses, I have little piggy eyes. It’s a 19th Century face, Victorian, not the perky, fake, plastic face the world wants you to wear today, a face so frozen it’s not even capable of a sneer, let alone a sincere smile. And you think I’m hateful, but. In fact, I wasn’t even really paying attention when it came up. I was sitting at the keyboard, trying to find something interesting to write about the last interschool football game (I don’t get off on football). There had been a craze that term for passing around porn videos. Several people had been working evenings in a video store, and slipping the porn out with them, and it got passed around… pretty much everybody had watched some. I certainly had. Paul and Lillith – no, of course her name wasn’t really Lillith, don’t be silly – were sitting somewhere behind me, over by the window, and I’d sort of heard that they were talking about the porn stuff and how unbelievably bad it was, but hey, we had a paper to get out, and somebody had to write it. When I say it was a paper, it was only a school paper… but I sort of had ambitions back then to be a journalist, and I thought it would look good on my resume. Anyway, there I was trying to get the paper together and there they were.
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