But could not do it. There my husband asked the sales guy, “What is it?” To which he replied, “A very special lingerie set, sir.” Then my husband said, “How will I know whether it is special or not? I can’t see it. And then he asked both of us to show it.The salesman wanted me to remove my hand. Hence held my hand and tried to pull it. I looked at him with an angry face. And he removed his hand. To which my husband said, “Show me the lingerie. What is special in that?” Now I had to remove my hand, my husband’s facial expression changed.My boobs were not at all covered. My husband could not actually see the bra laces as those were under my boobs. He said, “What’s special in this? There is actually nothing.” To which the salesman said, “Please look at the laces. They are holding the boobs. And it is looking sexy.”This was the first time he used the word boobs. And I felt ashamed to show the laces. He caught the lace on my left boob and while holding it he came down. Now he had to lift. ‘I can’t do this anymore, Dinah,’ Ian whispered softly. ‘I can’t watch the baby grow inside you and fall more and more in love with you every day, knowing that this is my JOB. This is my livelihood. This is not supposed to hurt anyone, but this time it does. It is hurting us both.’ He rocked Dinah as she sobbed against his chest, her tears wetting his scrub top as he continued to talk softly to her: ‘All my life, I’ve been told that I was worthless. That I would never amount to anything, never get a job worth any money … all the things that parents say in anger at their own lives. I found this place and I found my calling: making babies and taking care of women while they have them. And I’ve been good at it up to now, because I can – or I could – separate this from love. I’ve made good money. I’ve made good, strong babies that have made many childless couples happy. And it was easy because I didn’t want to be tied down. I had no desire to have what we were giving to all those.
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