...cue flashback noise and fade out sequence.... I was just a teenager and lived in a small little redneck town, not far from Boise. I was fairly normal I suppose, I played on the football team, rode dirt bikes, hunted and fished. I was a bit on the nerdy side, I suppose, I did well in school, was always writing poetry and playing the occasional game of D&D with my buddies. We were semi poor, though not on the verge of starvation or anything as dramatic as that. But we did live in a trailer house, I wore hand-me-downs and most of our possessions were used, though it really never made much of a difference to me. I had from a very young age been intensely interested in girls, long before my friends I often dreamed of kissing and dating the girls at my school. Ahead of my time I suppose. I often read my mothers harlequin and cheesy romance novels, attempting to learn and emulate the men in them. I was determined to grow up to be the perfect lover, strong yet sweet, hard yet tender, well. Well, maybe not worse, at least when she did that I could just sleep.Afterward, she would calm down and seem embarrassed, maybe even remorseful. She would become a sweet, gentle cuddle bunny, but again without sex. This would last about a day, and then the cycle would begin all over again. I knew she had issues. I figured she was bi-polar, but looking into her childhood and early years before we met revealed things that were maybe even darker, like borderline personality, possible schizophrenia and at least one attempted suicide.I tried to get her to see a doctor. She refused. I wanted to get her to see a therapist. She refused. I tried to get her to attend couples counseling with me. She refused.It wasn’t all bad. In her manic moods, she was a lot of fun and great to be around. She loved to party with our friends and neighbors but tended to over drink, which didn’t take much. Many times, we would go out to dinner with friends, and after two glasses of wine, she would be lit. After.
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