She searched out more serious sites and discovered that indeed they did do such things. Finally the computer had Lorna in its power. Following its dictates she began to explore herself and almost for the first time experienced powerful sexual arousal. This gave her a problem and one that loomed ever larger, what was she to do with all this sexual energy that was overtaking her? She tried tentatively to suggest a few things to Clifford, but he recoiled with horror, ‘A lay preacher could and never would do such things, they are of the Devil and I don’t know where you got such ideas from, but I shall pray for you.’ In her new found knowledge of sexual relationships Lorna had grown a trifle bolder and more independent. She knew that what she needed was not prayer but, if once more I may put it crudely, ‘A damned good fucking with lots of trimmings.’ Clifford had always insisted on Lorna dressing with extreme modesty. Nothing above mid-calf was ever seen, her dress necklines were what. My mouth gets all dry. My throat gets tight..." Connor--" Besides Tracy, you and Shane are the only family I've got. I don't want to be the guy who fucks up your marriage."I hugged him reassuringly. "Shane already knows how I feel about you, Connor. Nobody's cheating, nobody's lying, and nobody's got their head buried in the sand. We're all scared, but honestly? The alternative scares me more." What do you mean, the alternative?" I mean the alternative where you and I spend the rest of our lives pretending like there's nothing going on between us. Like I don't have to fight the urge to rip your clothes off your body every time you say hello. Like it's all just some harmless flirting and winking between two good friends. I'm terrified to think I might go my whole life, never..."Connor swallowed, his mouth dry. "Never what?"In reply, I slowly lowered my hand to his lap--felt the firm outline of his erection--and squeezed.Something in Connor snapped. He kissed me hard on the mouth,.
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