Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter, from the local WalMart:Dear Mrs. Xxxxxx:Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion, in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to, ban both of you from the store.Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Xxxxxx, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:1. March 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people’s carts when they weren’t looking.2. May 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.3. May 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women’s restroom.4. May 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, ‘Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away’. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance,. The taste, texture and feeling is out of this world. If I had to choose a last supper, dining at the ‘Y’ would have to be it. I am blessed with a slightly larger tongue and I use it now to good effect, running it round, licking and tasting those wonderful secretions. Such an amazing aphrodisiac, I thought. 'He' was hard and ready before, but now 'He’s' added glowing and throbbing to his indications of readiness repertoire. It’s so intense it almost hurts. You can’t take it anymore and pull me back up to eat and kiss my own mouth and lips. We stumble out into the main part of your bathroom and I lift you onto the perfectly positioned counter. The height was designed for this, it has to have been deliberate. I kneel down for one last taste, also to make sure you’re wet enough. Having satisfied myself, I lean you back against the wall mirror and put your legs over my shoulders. 'He' finds his way in without further help. Just the knob, pressing your lips, as he knocks, wanting to enter..
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