”She bracketed my face with her soft hands and looked with deep affection.“Baby listen to me. Listen to me closely. It wasn’t your fault. I know you wish or wonder if you could’ve done more. But you could not. We were too outnumbered to have a chance at resistance, and they were so… so strong. We were strangers and lost in their streets. They must have selected us as soon as they saw us and made their move.”A sudden sense of shame caused my head to try to turn away as I blubbered, “I know what you mean to do and it only makes me adore you all the more, but it doesn’t change the fact that I felt powerless, so helpless and powerless.”“You were, baby. you were made completely powerless. We both were.”“It all happened so fast, I mean, everything was great, we were in the thick of that marketplace, taking in the chattering accents; was like a wonderland, like the brochures promised. Then we somehow ended up in a quieter quarter and….”“And they who took us captive took notice of me and they. He suddenly felt the overwhelming need to get laid. He started chatting up a surprised but delighted forty-something man with a paunch. As the man later unlocked his apartment door, he turned to Jimmy and whispered, “I want you to use me as your whore. Use me hard and rough.”Not a problem, Jimmy thought, and even took a perverse pleasure in the man’s squeals as he fucked his flabby ass.Forty-something was entirely not the kind of person he’d normally fuck; he didn’t let himself think he was overcompensating, not even as he started to be a little sadistic with how hard and fast he fucked him. Not that the man minded. Nor did he reflect on why he said, “Your place,” when the man asked. He hated going to other men’s places. But on that night and throughout the winter, he never brought a man home. And he never let himself think it was so Tobin wouldn’t see a man leaving his house in the morning.*The winter passed excruciatingly slowly for Tobin. His few attempts to visit Jimmy had been.
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