"5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC."If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT."Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."7. My mother taught me IRONY."Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS."Shut your mouth and eat your supper."9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM."Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"10. My mother taught me about STAMINA."You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."11. My mother taught me about WEATHER."This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."12 My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY."If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE."I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION."Stop acting like your father!"15. My mother taught me. I had no intention of stopping -- unless and until she did that clean-and-jerk lifting thing, with both hands on my ears, once again.If there was no lifting, there would be no stopping! This was definitely turning into my best road trip -- ever!We won the rubber game Friday night and flew back to Baltimore after our brief road foray into the National League. Now two home series of inter-league play came next, with the Phillies and the Mets dropping by Camden Yards. We'd be back home for six days.There were only two reporters trailing us home, at1 a.m., from Baltimore-Washington International, but they were taking flash pictures when Samantha Suzuki met us on the front porch.Barefoot and wearing only brief shorts and a stretch halter, Samantha leaped into Shiggie's arms, and laid a wet one right on his lips as she straddled his hips suggestively with both her legs.Amy and I were a little shocked, and God knows what Shiggie was thinking, but the "lovers' reunion" looked realistic as.
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