When I told her I am gay she said, 'you were always different from the moment you were born'. I was a sissy from the beginning. I wanted dolls. Tiny china tea services. As I grew older, I played only with girls, loved only girly games, spent all my time with girls. The bullying started when I was about eight. The name calling, the thumps and blows. I endured a few years of that, simply not understanding why it was happening. Despite this, I went on playing with the girls. Hopskotch, wall flowers (a singing game with very girly dance movements). But the bullying increased in intensity and I saw the only way out as trying to conform to male gender conditioning. At grammar school, with no girls to play with, I decided to butch up. The bullying stopped. I played rugby and hated it but saw it as a way of conforming. At 12 I began to masturbate but always to the idea of dominant males. I began to believe that the only way they would even consider me as a sexual partner would be if I. All of mygirlfriends had come early enough to have last minute fittings for theirgowns. They praised my fashion taste seeing that looked absolutelygorgeous fabulous in the gowns.A month before the wedding we held my bridal shower. I was embarrassedby the gifts of luxurious lingerie for my wedding trousseau. Jason willbe pleased, I thought as I opened each scented and femininely wrappedpackage."That's not fair" I screamed in protest on opening Bridget's gift. "Youcan't expect me to wear this." It was a satin bridal set of balcony brathat would expose my nipples and open crotched thong panty that wouldexpose, well, you know what. It also came with a very frilly garter beltand silk stockings."But you must. It's to wear on your wedding day and to encourage Jasonto fulfill his obligations in the conjugal bed," responded Britneylaughing. There were many more sexy items of clothing for my boudoir. Weall had a laugh imagining me dressed so provocatively for Jason'spleasure. I was having fun.
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