“Leonard, you need to get down! Jackie’s been hurt and I’m calling for help!”“Jackie got hurt?” When his eyes finally focused on the blood, he lost it. He ran to her and dropped to his knees taking her hand. He began screaming at her, “No Jackie, no Jackie, no Jackie, no Jackie!” When at last he understood she wasn’t going to answer him, he bent over her body clasping her hand and wept loudly.When Cheyenne heard the shot, she hunkered down in the laundry room for a couple of minutes waiting to see what would happen. Just as I was hanging up from the 911 call, she dashed down the walkway to the bar and burst in the door. She just stood there taking in the scene; she saw Leonard sobbing over Jackie, she saw me crouching in front of the register, she saw the glass on the floor and then the blown-out window.As she walked slowly toward her mother, I reached up and grabbed her hand, pulling her down into a hug. “Don’t look, baby! It’s not something you want to see.”She pulled back and. But neither of us want to be monogamous. She definitely doesn’t.”“Do you love her?”“I don’t know. Probably not. Except sometimes ... I mean the intimacy ... and not just in bed ... when we talk ... Sarah, it’s a lot like what we have.”“How close I feel with you is how you feel with her.”“Yes.”“And you don’t want it to end, even if means not being with me.”“If it comes to that, yes.”“You want to have your cake and eat it too.”“If that means we can somehow continue to be friends and lovers, yes I do.”“You know I should hate you. Why the fuck don’t I hate you?”“Not something I can answer, even if it was rhetorical. Except to say if I misled you, I’m sorry.”“You kind of did. You kind of locked the gate after the horse left. Because that discussion after the fact, when I found out how sweet it was being here in your arms, and you tell me you don’t want to be my boyfriend ... I don’t know, Joe. It started with me being rather desperate wanting to have sex with you. And ends up with me.
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