Now." They were really embarrassed andMichelle's boyfriend left soon after. The other girls started askingMichelle how it felt and if she really would have gone farther. I didn't take part in the hazing because I knew how she felt. I had beengoing out with guys, nothing serious, but I had been felt up, and hadheld a cock, and knew what happened when you rubbed it the right way.That always gave me a feeling of power, to be able to make a guy beg meto continue and to make him cum. I also knew how much ‘won't' power ittakes to stop a guy from going farther than you really want him to. Butthat wasn't really the reason I didn't tease Michelle. The real reason was that I had spotted the hard on that Paul had gottenfrom seeing the amorous couple. He had covered well, but I knew thesigns. I got real horny and started to fantasize about Paul. Fromtalking to Carla I knew that he hadn't started looking at women yet. Hehad been two years without a bed partner. I wondered if I could.... I was always the kid she avoided, and at the end of summer when vacation bible school let out she gave me a passive hug and a baleful glare as I left. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I had committed a mortal sin — I had questioned the authority of the church. Young minds, you see, are supposed to believe anything the church tells them. Don’t learn or ask questions children, just believe what we tell you to believe. I simply wasn’t willing to buy that. I was an avid reader, which was a bit odd for my age. I consumed National Geographic and Scientific American magazines like they were popcorn. I was smarter than most kids my age, and much smarter than most Southern baptists twice my age. I never frequented church regularly until I was a teenager, and when I would attend it was mostly to pacify relatives who wanted me to go. I thought at the time that it was out of a need to be close to me, close to a part of our family. I soon learned otherwise. It was an attempt to make me a part.
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