The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands, but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side.“Here, hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich” she said.I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers...I love mustard.I had no napkin.I licked it off.It was not mustard.No man ever put a baby down faster.It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding out.With a washcloth in each hand, I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.Later, after she stopped crying from laughing so hard, my wife said, “Now you know why they call that fancy mustard Poupon”.When you stop laughing, pass it on.This one is from John A.No one believes seniors ... everyone thinks they are senile.An elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married. "Don't let Carol get away or you will have to worry about me killing you, Susan will be the least of your worries," she said with a smile.Carol got back into the van. Greta and John stayed in the back of the van out of sight. "Interesting," she said. "The FAA, the NTSB and the FBI are all investigating the plane crash." "Why the FBI?" John asked. "They don't usually get involved in something like this." Carol shrugged her shoulders. "The newspapers didn't have much to say about the plane crash that we don't already know." "The main thing the newspapers are writing about is the reorganization of the company and the sell-off of certain divisions." John started to blow up, "Get this van back to the office, I want to see what happens this afternoon." "There is no reason to reorganize any part of the company." "Sell off what divisions?" he asked, "Why sell off anything." John was so mad that Carol and Greta had trouble calming him down. Carol parked the van a safe distance from the.
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