I wanted something more stronger than the porn that was available to me.I watch it for a little while and then I threw it in the trash. I was struggling with the devil, but I was also the devil.I want the world of sexual hedonism, but I want to love good people, and I want the light of God. I don't want to lose my soul, and I my evil is hidden within the fold. It is in a place that only God and Satan can see it. God and Satan lead me home. I hate neither of them. I love them both. I am black, but that does not absolve me of guilt. Being black is not my entertainment. My name is Tyrone Quin.My two favorite women are as different to each other as night and day.One is Joan of Arc and the other is Lucy Lawless. Lucy Lawless is the most sexy woman I have ever seen.I love her so very much. If she were a man I would love her still. That is the truth. I sometimes think about an alternate future in which God has saved Satan, and many of the people from Satan's house. Lucy Lawless is number. It was wrong for me to have sexual thoughts about my mother. Wasn’t it?I didn’t want to have them, yet I did. I wanted to act out my fantasies with Mom. But that would be wrong. Wouldn’t it?Intellectually, I knew that it would be wrong. But that didn’t change the way I felt. And I was ashamed of the way I felt. But secretly, deep down inside, I enjoyed fantasizing about having sex with Mom.I knew, however, that any fantasies that I had would stay just that, fantasies. Mom would never have sex with me. It would be wrong. Wouldn’t it?Although...If Susan hadn’t been the one fondling me in the lake the day before, it must’ve been Mom. I wasn’t 100% convinced that Susan wasn’t pulling my leg, but still...Mom had been eyeing my erection as I got dressed earlier, of that I was sure.I was so confused. I knew what I wanted, but I also knew that it would never become a reality. So I reluctantly pushed my carnal thoughts about my mother to the back of my brain and took notice of the world.
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