My father’s body was there, of course, but he had checked out long before. No one looks entirely the same in the casket, but my father looked entirely different. Even his eyebrows appeared to have been shaped an entirely different way. I spent four hours in a daze, nodding and smiling to friends and strangers alike. 100 people exactly had signed the guest book, notentirely shabby as all his 6 brothers and sisters were deceased. I wept as I threw a solitary rose on his coffin, watching the gentle winds of May scatter the petals into the void. As is often true in these cases, the first few weeks after my father’s death were bearable, since I was in a complete state of shock. Then, when reality set in, I found that I would spontaneously cry while driving or when a flower bloomed in my garden I knew he loved. Particularly irksome was the fact I couldn’t share with him some exciting things happening in my life. I had been nominated for Who’s Who in Education and had received a. “I’ll be by first thing in the morning.”“I’ll be dead to the world,” I smiled.“Then I’ll Prince Charming your ass, Sleeping Beauty,” she said. “Oh wait. Prince Charming your ass, Snow White.”“Get inside,” I said, and we waved as Alex closed the door behind her.“Cab?” I said turning to face my remaining two girls. They looked at each other. Max leaned in and kissed a surprised Sam.“I’m actually still OK,” Max said.“I’m not really off on Max so much as Alex,” Sam frowned. “Let’s go. I want to get to bed, and running will keep us warmer.”It was a good premise: running probably would have kept us warm. Too bad we were already cold. We should’ve called a cab and huddled up in the nearby bus stop. The wind was poking at us. Bursts of air that slammed us whenever we took a corner. At least the streets were empty. No one but us was out in this stupidity.“Christ!” Max squealed as she slipped along some ice, but kept herself from falling by hip-checking the snowbank. I rushed over to grab her.
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