The two smaller dildos were tiny in comparison, only 9" and 7" long, respectively. All were meant for my ass? OMG, no!The Rambone was impossible. Nothing that thick could ever go up someone's behind. I discounted that immediately. The two smaller dildos I could handle, I thought, without injuring myself. The shaft of the larger was 7" long, the other measured 6" long. One was intimidatingly thick, the other not so much. I thought I would enjoy the 6" shaft up my ass. I laughed. Who had sent these damned things?Now I was scared. No one knew I was queer. No one that I knew of, anyway. Somebody did, though. And they knew I liked fucking my ass.It was not late enough to do anything now. I stuck the box on top of the refrigerator and went to the den to watch TV. The TV in the den is 54" wide. My TV Is 32" and not HD. No comparison.I watched TV until 10 o'clock, when Mom called again. Dad and Kendal were worse. She was worried about herself, but so far, nothing more than sympathetic. When I returned he helped me unload and put away my shopping then invited me out to lunch. I agreed and drove us up to the moors to a remote pub set in the bleak high moors landscape. He had phoned around and managed to get a cancellation. We were lucky because everywhere was fully booked so close to Christmas.There was a big coal fire making the place warm and cosy. It was busy and it was crowded with people making an early start on the Bacchanalian festivities but we settled down to a tasty lunch, accepting the slow service as par for the course this time of year, then decided to get some fresh air. We strolled along one of the farm roads that snaked up the hillside, our breath steaming in the clear crisp air. Our conversation was wide and varied but we were both panting from the unaccustomed exercise when we turned back and descended to the pub. The drive home took us through villages of stone cottages nestled along the rocky mountain stream which rapidly became a river bubbling in.
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