Yeah, that is how I felt about it. At first I tried to separate myself from them. Taking long assignment that took me away from the sight. But I could not do it. I- I Loved Vashe. If he had been more- we would have been physical but it was not possible. He had too many upgrades and Mechanical parts, I stop again as I remember the shame I felt at my orders madness.You can love without touching, Nimrod reminds me.I know, and I did, I agree and continue on.I came back and found them even more mad than before I left. They were not even hiding it anymore, just taking over, gaining power and territory. The others were talking about how to handle them. I tried to explain and see if I could talk to the Mahy, but that did not work. Not even Vashe. He no longer felt bad for what he was doing.Oh love, I am so sorry, he says.I feel his grief and horror at what I had to endure. But there is more, still more.It was not enough to block the power, they had to be stopped, I say, continuing on. I went. Saying this she turned around and made a hasty retreat. My God ! What a girl? I was too stunned to react and just sat there dazed. After regaining composure I found myself shaking my head in disbelief. I then started my car and drove home with a heady feeling and wondering would I really be able to make it out with her?It seemed a very distinct possibility because I am not a big fan of making it out on the road and it was next to impossible in the hotel and at home I had a wife. Again her place was the last place I would visit for such ill purpose and taking her to some other hotel was below my dignity as that would appear too cheap. Again I was filled with mixed emotions…………. Surrounded by uncertainty. One part of me wanted her badly and the other part says would I have the guts to take the virginity of such a young and gorgeous girl. And what would its implications be. Perhaps I was worrying too much because as mentioned earlier the opportunity for such an encounter was very less..
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