Then go and getdressed for our outing. After I am dressed, I put together a light picnic lunchfor myself with something extra for each of my pets. Opening the garage door, I grab the leashes and signal for my pets to followme. They bound eagerly into the garage where I open the side door on the vanfor them to get in. The van has tinted windows so no one can see what is insidebut my pets can see out. I pull out of the garage and set off. As I pull offthe road onto the little track that serves as my driveway to where I sometimescamp, the pets start getting very excited and bounce around the car. I letthem do it, knowing this is a big treat for them. I park the van and open the side door for them to get out. The dogs leap outand start rushing around checking out the smells. But gem just waits patientlyfor me to put her leash on. She loves her leash and much prefers being walkedon a leash to be let free. To tell you the truth, I prefer it too. There arefew things more erotic than a nude. And I have. And it relates to hockey. Alarm bells start to ring…..My 16 year old sister’s ‘sweet and lovely’ friend is a player in our mixed team. And sure enough, it’s his number. Realisation is fairly slow to dawn I must say. ‘Sweet and Lovely’, was not after MY address….Sweet and Lovely was after my SISTER’S address. Bugger. I trudge home finally, to find that, yes ‘Sweet and Lovely’ has sent my sister a valentine’s card, and no, there’s nothing waiting for me. So I settle myself down with a few magazines and start cutting out some lush lads to put on my wall to help me smile first thing in the morning. N&G seem to thrilled to be loaded with enough ammo for the next 17 visits, and are so lovely…. ‘Never mind…it was never going to beat last year…..why don’t you give your ex a ring, does he have a new gf?’ I breathe in, I have to find a way to shut them up…..or else this really will turn into a cliched valentine’s day massacre….. and then grandad delivers what he believes to be.
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