The other factor tends not to ask for things unless they feel the answer would be yes. This side would prefer to put out feelers to find out what the other side thinks about a request and in fact is hoping for an offer before the request is made. Even after an offer is made, the person tries to ascertain as to the sincerity of said offer before it is accepted. Although there is no right or wrong side to these cultures, when the two are brought together it usually makes for unpleasantness for the giver. While the asker fails to see the harm in asking, the giver feels it’s rude to deny a request. This results in the giver giving up things or favors he doesn’t really want to just to keep decorum. Many times the asker has no idea he is overstepping the bounds of courtesy thus insulting the giver even further. Often the asker fails to understand the subtle hints and feelers the giver is sending and thus neglects to offer said favor. Their standard line when approached about this is, ‘all. I grabbed my phone, drove into the city, and walked into the bar….scattered around were two or three men…I took my place at a table, and commenced… At 6.00 the first man walked to my table. He sat, quietly asked my name, offered his. I asked him if he had enjoyed his day. He spoke well, and was attentive, and polite. I asked him if he would like to join me and a small group of other men in Room 319 at 8.00 p.m. He said that he would like that very much, and then left. Of the six men scheduled, five arrived on time, and as requested. Two of the five I didn’t like. One seemed edgy, bordering on belligerent, and asked me questions I preferred not to answer. The other was too young, too innocent. I told them both that they would not be joining us that night. I had three men lined up to come to the room at 8.00. The Arranger was the last I met in the bar, so we sat together longer than the others. He asked me whether there were some things I would rather not happen, as well as things I.
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