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Either that, or the staff was paid well enough to pretend to like it. I was pretty sure that we had some of both kinds here.Dammit! I hated staying here, doing nothing every day until my mind went, or (even worse) I found myself "of whole mind" but trapped in a useless body that couldn't do anything, which would, of course, lead rapidly to my mind going...Being helpless -against my will- had always been one of my greatest nightmares, but that hadn't happened for a long time. Of course, being helpless -with my consent- had once been one of my greatest pleasures, but, well, that kind of thing hadn't happened for a long time now, either.Note to self: When Georgina gets here, try again to talk her into smuggling a gun into my room. I'd been trying to talk my granddaughter into that for almost twenty years -I started that almost as soon as I woke up in my first "home", which happened soon after I fell down the stairs at my last real home, and my children recognized that they couldn't take. "Jake, get us three shots of tequila, on his tab!" she shouteddown to my sometimes psychiatrist, sometimes pal, but always bartender. "three?" I looked around, hoping it would be her twin or maybe anotherequally gorgeous girl joining us. "Yea, one for me, two for you, or are you going to backout on your promisesalready?" her tone wasn't challenging as much as it was disappointed. I wasn't going to blow this, no matter what, so I had to recover quickly andhope that whatever I had said last night would be revealed later on in theevening. "oh, I just figured you would have ordered six, to savetime," smiling, I still have it, after all these beers, er uh, I meanyears. "Oh no, I like variety. Besides too much tequila and I will be speakingSpanish," such a cute joker, and her eyes, they didn't betray a thing. butI was certain she was plotting, I could just feel it. probably the way amouse feels when staring into the eyes of a snake, not knowing what the movewill be next, but certain that.
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