Touched one with the tip of my pinky finger...”St. Peter says “Alright Sister, now dip the tip of your pinky finger in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted.” and she did so.St. Peter now turns to the second nun and says “Sister, have you ever touched a penis?”“Well ... There was this one time ... that I held one for a moment...”“Alright Sister, now just wash your hands in the Holy Water, and you may be admitted” and she does so.Now at this, there is a noise, a jostling in the line. It seems that one nun is trying to cut in front of another!St. Peter sees this and asks the Nun “Sister Susan, what is this? There is no rush!”Sister Susan responds “Well if I’m going to have to gargle this stuff, I’d rather do it before Sister Mary sticks her ass in it!”This one is compliments of Joe SAfter a tiring day, a commuter settled down in his seat and closed his eyes.As the train rolled out of the station, the young woman sitting next to him pulled out her cell phone and started talking in a. I mean she's not going to be nana, coming roundon birthdays and all that. I mean maybe she'll be Aunt Peggy, if that.I mean you can't expect us to just let her back in after all theseyears. Bring the family around. We can have one big Christmas dinner.Me, you, Matt, Bill, Julia, the boys, Peggy and whoever the hell shebrings around with her. Shame Dad's not here for this. See if thispoor bastard Perry is still here. Maybe, he'll bring my sisters." Ispat out the word and then paused. These poor girls were no morecomplicit than Bill and I were. Then I realised that I couldn'tremember their names or if Peggy had even said them. Or if we had evenasked. I started to cry. "Sorry, Fi." Kells, I'm sorry. It's OK. I wish I was there with you." Me too," I sniffled."Imagine me holding you," she said. "Can you do that?" Yes." I could feel her arms around me and felt better. Stupidhormones."It's going to be OK," she said. "I love you, Kells." I love you, Fi," I said, as Bill.
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