Neil and I had been awkward with each other the day before. And today I was no longer wearing my wedding band, having agreed to Jason removing all my rings the day before. We were still legally married, but emotionally our marriage was in freefall.As seven p.m. approached, my stomach was doing somersaults, I was so nervous. I physically couldn’t stand up, I was that anxious. Several times I told Jason that I couldn’t go through with it, but he gently encouraged me and said it was best to get it out of the way.At seven o’clock, Jason pressed the call button and then stepped into the background, to give me support but without being visible on the camera.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~“Amy, Caitlyn!”The icon showed Neil’s name, but it was definitely not Neil’s face looking at me.It was the faces of our daughters, huddled side-by-side to both be in the frame.“Mum, we know all about it. Dad told us everything,” our elder daughter Amy told me.I felt myself flush with. I felt like barfing from the stink of thedumpster we were hiding in. My friend already had. I pulled her closeras she started crying again. "It's gonna be okay. All you gotta do whenwe get to the shelter is tell them what's been happening." But I'm scared!" Shhh. I just heard someone pass a couple of minutes ago. We don't wantanyone coming back here."Luka leaned her head on my shoulder and whispered between snuffles,"I'm sorry." It's okay." I pulled back a little and shooed a fly away from herface. "So what ya scared of?" My mom. You've got no idea what she's like." Trust me, I know better than you think. Sometimes you've gotta standup for yourself, even when you're scared." Ever since Mom beat me when I told her I was a girl, I've beenscared." Her jaw tightened as she hissed through her teeth. "I'm tiredof being scared." She squeezed her eyes shut and began sobbing noisily.I was busy rocking my friend and barely noticed when pale light and awhiff of fresh air hit my face. I probably.
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