Even going 1.25 inches, it would cause a wound only .5 inches wide or so. I measured off 1.25 inches and put several layers of duct tape on the blade as a safety stop. This would absolutely guarantee that the blade would stop at the desired depth. I was confident in my calculations and would just look at the blade, review my movie from last year and get giddy and nervous and excited imagining the blade going into my gut.This was around the 2nd week of July. I need to do this by the 23rd. I was so ready and getting myself worked up psychologically for the annual ritual. To be honest, just the thought of a piece of hard, cold steel blade entering my gut gets me to a point of insanityI stabbed myself twice last year, but it was so shallow. Would I be able to this year? As the day approached, I made a trip to the desert to scout out a proper and private location. Last year’s spot was compromised. I parked my car, got my cameras, two this year for simultaneous filming from two angles, and. He sat quietly surveying the meal knowing its significance; it was magnificent, and the smile on his wife`s face was broad and sunny. He waited to see what was for afters and was relieved to see the apple pie and the jug of custard on the drainer; she smiled at him and blew him a silent kiss. The men soon set off to replace the lads, no words on what had happened passed between them in the house; it had not been the moment. It was Joe that broke the awkward silence after they had relieved the two lads and they had gone, stopping Jay as he was about to set off round the pens to check the flock, “Look lad let’s not have any awkwardness between us” the older man said, “you have had my wife, you know it and I know of it, I don’t mind, in fact I am turned on by it, so if she wants you to share her that`s OK with me, as long as I get my share, and she doesn’t leave me.“ Jay said he was glad Joe had taken that attitude, that he had as he said “had Pam” and was keen to do it again, but.
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