’ ‘Oh, Caroline, I didn’t drive nearly 500 miles to get some beer from you. I drove 500 miles to see you, to be with you.’ The words fell from his lips before he couldn’t even stop them. Caroline stopped dead in her tracks and walked over to her bed to sit down. Ethan started to look around her room and really took the time to observe her. Caroline’s room had all sorts of whitewater posters up — from rafting to kayaking to gear that was advertised. Her blanket had lots of colorful stripes on it which reminded Ethan of her spirit: very positive and full of life. Ethan couldn’t help but smile when seeing her bedspread. Then, he noticed her organization- her books all stacked on top of each other next to her backpack, her computer, pencils, and calendar which every day was nearly marked with something for her to do or for someone for her to see. Ethan loved every detail about her room. It spoke of Caroline in so many small but powerful ways. Then, he finally took the time to look at. I assumed it was because I now knew the secret of what he was hiding in his trousers. My heart raced at the thought.

 ‘It’s how God ordained,’ I said. ‘If God gave all men such things, you don’t need to be ashamed for me to see or even touch yours. I will never see or touch you there again until we marry. But I must be sure. You see that, don’t you, my sweet love?’

 ‘I know. But it’s more. It’s not only what God gave me that I don’t want you to see. It’s what Johnny Reb gave me. It’s so ugly.’

 ‘No,’ I said. ‘I hadn’t even noticed.’

 I now observed that his left leg was somewhat swollen and reddish, and especially so all around a sunken white place about the size of a dollar coin where the muscle had been torn away.

 ‘It’s not ugly. It just … a hurt place. Does it pain you?’

 ‘Yes, often it does. The doctors said it would slowly get better, and it has, but I’ll always feel it, especially when it’s cold. ‘

 ‘It’s warm now,’ I said, and began gently to draw a circle around the.
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