"From this point onyou either sink or swim all on your own." Don't sweat it, Dennis," I replied with a wide smile. "This is sosimple that I'm surprised the guys in the frat even bother to call itan initiation." Just be careful out there," warned Dennis. "I know most of myfraternity brothers a whole lot better than you do. They can be verytricky and overly devious whenever the need arises. They'll dowhatever they deem necessary to make sure you measure up to theirstandards." I've heard that about a few of them," I replied. "But what can theypossibly do with something so simple." You might be surprised," said Dennis. "Do you know what you need todo to pass your initiation." Sure I do. I told you it was simple," I smiled. "All I have to dois go into the woods and spend the night in some old cottage. Whatcould possibly be simpler?" It's not as simple as it seems, Todd. The rumor around campus is thewoods are haunted. They haven't used this particular initiation forthe past five years. At. It made me feel apprehensive and vulnerable.It dawned on me that they weren't looking at a person, but at a sexualobject. They were coldly sizing me up and rating me, just as I had doneto the women in the Mall. In my mind they were imagining me undressedand fantasizing about fucking the nubile Asian girl. Here was thedownside to my desire for attention and validation. It didn't feelcomfortable to be on the receiving end of the male gaze.I had gotten to the movie theater early so as to be at the front by thebarriers with a crowd of screeching celebrity spotters. It was coldenough that even the leggings couldn't protect me from gooseflesh, asthe occasional draft whirled up my dress. There was a red carpet beyondthe barrier, covering the sidewalk, and under glaring lights the greatand good strolled in, stopping to pose for the obligatory flash photos,some of them working the shrieking, demanding fans to shake hands andsign autographs. Then, after a long wait, there was Cobalt,.
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