In retrospect, it was good that my body type is wrong for a runway model, although I can do some lingerie and bikini. My point is that I wasn’t diverted into modeling. One useful area where I got close to modeling was some on-the-job work in fashion photography.“Still, fashion industry partying gets pretty wild. Some of the models are extremely disciplined, and that often gets them even better jobs. Others, however, will do anything for a fine job, and there’s a certain tendency, among the buyers, etc., to assume that all women are sexually available.“Don’t get me wrong. I was happy to be available when there was mutual attraction. Unfortunately, I went to a party held by some very rich people, whose younger children were connected to the industry but also felt very entitled. Those people also were connected in a different sense of the word. The older generations did not want a lot of public visibility.“You probably know that the Mob, for want of a better term, thinks of themselves. We looked like sisters. There I was a 17 year old crossdresser all made up pretty in a white flower girl dress, Pretty as a picture in a bridal magazine. Only there I was again, beside myself a 30 year old wearing the same dress I was wearing now! My mind wandered back 13 years to a lonely 17 year old boy, Quite confused. Thinking he was crazy because he wanted to dress up in girls clothes. Trying desperately to suppress these crazy desires. When this vaguely familiar but pretty 30 year old girl appeared out of nowhere. She turned out to be a crossdresser and seemed to know everything about me. She showed me that I was not crazy that it was all right even fun to wear girl's clothes. Suddenly it was all so clear, the girl that had seduced me 13 years ago had been me. A time trip back in time13 years, How was I to get back? First I would have to rent a place that I knew would be vacant back in 1987 and then transport the parts for a time machine back. Then when I sent myself back I.
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