"I love you," I said, the first time I had been able to give voice towhat I'd been enjoying for some time. "You I love."And it was so worth the wait; the weight of a man, the slow and steadymovement as he filled and stretched me; arching my back, pushing my bodyhard against him, digging my nails into his back and screaming a longorgasm. I wept a little afterwards, while he tried to comfort me -clearly horrified he'd done something awful - but the tears ran withhappiness. You see, I'd always imagined that when I finally found thecourage to take a man to my bed again my ex's ghost would swoop to wailof what he'd done to me, what we'd done together and the things I'd doneat his insistence. The ghost never came, or if it did I never saw it -because Danny felt so different. The ex's sex had him at its centreleaving me an accessory to his needs, his fantasies and fetishes. Asgood as the sex had been, I'd been a passenger, never Alice - a canvasfor him to work his wishes upon.Danny made love. From Illinois. A small rural town. We've been having fun palling around together since she got here. The first concert went well, I thought, but the director let us have it afterward and told us we'd better shape up or he'd send us all back and get another bunch. We all laughed, but knew he meant for us to get more serious very quickly, or we wouldn't live up to our own promise. So I may not have a chance to write again for a little while. Remember I love you and miss you, Jonathan.Friday, June 29thForgive me for taking so long with this letter, but I think you'll understand why. This past weekend we did another concert and it went about the same. Mr. Hanson got mad at us and threatened to ship us all out again. Then he doubled, do you believe it, doubled the rehearsal time. Eight hours a day! All last week we did nothing but play. My lips are so sore. I wish you were here to kiss them for me. I think he might let up a little next week, but in the meantime, everyone here has to.
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