They also called an ambulance because I had managed to land at one of the few Buffalo area hospitals that didn’t have a cardiac care unit. My wife and the ambulance arrived at the same time. I gave her my wallet and the keys to my truck. This time, she kissed me goodbye and whispered a quiet, ‘I’m sorry.’ They loaded me into the ambulance and we shot down the road to Buffalo General at eighty miles and hour. I was feeling grimmer by the minute. An emergency medical tech gave me a clip board. ‘You’ll have to sign this so we can give treatment.’ ‘What happens if I don’t?’ I asked. ‘Then you’re probably not going to make it to the hospital.’ I quickly signed the paper and vowed to stop being a wise guy. I saw the EMT stick a needle into the IV and then the lights went out. I floated on a purple cloud. Strange dreams danced in my psyche. I wondered if I was dead. A bright light woke me up. I was flat on my back. I looked around. My mother and my sister were standing beside the bed. What. She was totally after you. I wasn’t surprised when she told us that she wanted to stay with you for a few days. I ... I guess I didn’t understand that you were the reluctant one. Shit, most guys would dump their wife on their wedding day to spend an afternoon licking the soles of her feet. You just...”“It took me a bit of time to understand where she was going,” I admitted. “I was ... I was going to hit on you, actually.”“Good thing you didn’t,” Jill said.“Yeah, that would have been awkward,” I said.“Shit,” Jill said, stretching the word out to five seconds. “I would have totally rocked you and ruined you for other women. I’m a wildcat in the sack!”“You won’t even let a guy donkey punch you,” I countered. “Total tease!”Jill laughed and pointed her finger at me. Her face changed and she glanced around me.“Speaking of teases,” she said, “that skanky Skye is dancing with my man!”“Skanky Skye, Luscious Liz and ... Juicy Jill?” I asked with a laugh.Jill fished an ice cube out of her drink.
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