But it was early, only 3.30 p.m. Then I heard the buzzer go off and I knew someone had entered the arcade. I stood near a corner, waiting. It was pretty dark in the arcade, so I was able to get a pretty good look at him before he spotted me. As he approached, I slunk back up against the wall and pretended to be texting.He was a big dude in his thirties. He had a shaved head and goatee. He was wearing a wife beater t-shirt, baggy jeans shorts, and basketball shoes. My overall impression of him was that he looked like a gangsta - exactly the type of guy who wouldn't tolerate a white person in this neighbourhood. But I knew from experience that in here, things would be different.He spotted me as soon as he turned the corner. He looked at me for a second but kept walking around the arcade. I was disappointed, but I knew that chances were really good that he'd be back. He, like me, had come here for a reason. I also knew that black dudes - ANY men, really - who came to these arcades, were. I can move forward.She hangs up, and I hear the sound of her phone locking. I back away from the ledge. I might not be scared of standing there, but I'm scared to death at the thought of her standing there. Carly sighs, trudging to me wearily, "They're on their way." Her hand finds my shoulder, and we share a tight smile.And I feel the edge of it. The edge of panic, and I grab her hand. "Carls, I know... I know you need time but... please... don't leave me alone. I don't- I can't be alone."She shushes me, drawing me into a hug and pressing her lips to my forehead. I feel like a five-year-old. But it's in a good way. I feel safe. Like, if I'm with her, nothing bad can happen. And I know my logic is fucked up, just look at the events of the past week. But I like feeling this way. I don't want to question it. I don't want to lose it.And we stay like that, my arms wrapped tight around Carly, just needing her, just needing her to hold me. Because I'm starting to realise, and it's making.
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