‘Yeah. But doing that, it was the only way to make myself feel human again. It went on for months.’ ‘What happened?’ ‘Raven busted me,’ she confessed. ‘I told her everything. She was like my buddy in AA or something. Whenever I felt the need I would go to her.’ I just looked at her. I didn’t know what to say. ‘So,’ she said. ‘When you feel the need, call me.’ ‘Maranda…’ ‘Shh,’ she said, placing her finger on my lips. She looked into my eyes, smiled. ‘I love you, Lance,’ she confessed. I’m sure I gasped. ‘What?’ Holding her smile, she nodded. ‘I love you,’ she repeated. ‘I believe I always have. It’s okay if you don’t love me back. Just know that I love you and I’ll be here for you. I just… I don’t want you to be alone right now,’ she said and brought her lips back to mine. I brought my hand to her neck, just beneath her hairline, and pulled her close to me, kissing her, deeply. From somewhere inside me, passion took over, making me forget for a moment that we were in a public school. "You want to talk?" Alyssa asked, but Tina just slowly shook her head.After all, she loved Alyssa. If she let her emotional defenses down now,she would tell her everything.It would take away the one close friend Alyssa had left, the only one whounderstood the isolation she felt.After all, she thought, I feel the same way. The boys who are attractedto me, I am repulsed by once we get intimate. The girls who are attractedto me are repulsed by me once we get intimate. Even Meredith.Would Gerrilynn have killed herself if not for the therapy? Did killingherself give her the final release she needed? Would it do so for me?"Tina? You need to rest. You need to get away from this."Now, that was funny."Want me to rest with you?"An offer I can't refuse. She went willingly. The soft scent grew stronger and she sighed heavilyjust so she could breathe it in.Alyssa pulled her close and held her. Could I be wrong? Strength faded out and sleep finally came on, relentless.#The school was like a giant.
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